26. Art From 5 West
As I think most of my readers know, I just checked myself out of the psych ward at Georgetown Hospital. After two exhilarating, exciting days in 5 West, for some reason, I was ready to leave. I learned a few choice tidbits. Apparently, you can harm yourself with a lot of things. So I got my shoes taken away (they had shoelaces), and I had to take off my street clothes in exchange for two hospital robes – “One in front, one in back.” They took my rings, my cell phone, my birth control pills. No one was fucking around.
In my downtime at this glorious place, which was 99% of always, I had to find some way to entertain myself. The TV channel was not under my control (a sign beneath it said, “Please do not change the channel on this TV. Ask the community first.”
I happily discovered that I am somewhat of an artistic prodigy in crayon and soft pastel.
Here are my masterpieces. All are for sale. My comrades in 5 West suggested that I submit my work to the National Gallery – but first I will submit them to you, my blog readers.
“Study of a Swedish Fish in Aquamarine,” soft pastel on paper, $500.
“The Beach at Sunset,” soft pastel on paper, $425.
“Nighttime with Field,” soft pastel on paper, $250.
“Slug In Meadow,” crayon on paper, $475.
Here I would like to note that I was forced to switch to crayon when the bitch-lady who ran Group Therapy locked the pastels away after we had a bit of a tiff. Luckily, I had the nursing staff on my side, and my main man Leul opened the closet for me when I asked for something to draw with. Now, I thank the bitch-lady for pushing my boundaries by changing my medium.
“Butterfly Over Flowers,” crayon on paper, $675.
“Large-Headed Squirrel Under Birds’ Nest,” crayon on paper, $500.
“Untitled No. 1,” crayon on paper, $750.